Is It Anti-Feminist to Let Him Pay?

  • By Natasha Scripture
  • October 25, 2013

Besides, I still subscribe to the idea that men are hunters and women are meant to be hunted. As women, we are powerful, mysterious beings — wild, complicated and alluring. We are mothers in the making, creators of the universe, master multitaskers — basically, too busy to chase a guy or deal with something as trivial as picking up the tab. 
Yet as with everything in life, nothing is 100 percent black and white. I once dated a younger man who was, shall we say, fiscally challenged, and every time the bill came, I felt awkward.  Do I pay because I am like 1,000 years older, or do I let him pay because he is European and chivalry is his birthright? I always felt guilty when he paid, it felt un-romantic “going Dutch,” and I felt too much like a sugar mommy when I paid. So I ended up avoiding scenarios where we would have to deal with a check. 
In a nutshell, this is the story of how I learned how to cook a good meal — which, by the way, is the surest way to any man’s heart. I suppose it is kind of comforting to know that in an ever-changing world, some things don’t ever change.

Natasha is a New York-based writer covering lifestyle, spirituality and women’s issues for a variety of media outlets. Follow her on Twitter @natscript.

You Might Also Like:
5 Marriage Benefits of Being the Breadwinner
Why Separate Accounts Helped Keep Us Together
Have You Had the Talk?

Tagged in: Live, Relationships