I had a client recently tell me that she’d give up her entire income for the year if she could “make things right” with her daughter. She’d convinced herself that when things with her business were on the upswing, her personal life started to fall apart — and vice versa. What my client was doing (and what many of us do) was creating an obstacle to success that existed only in her mind. It took vocalizing this thought for her to conquer the perception that she couldn’t experience harmony both at work and at home.
We create our own “money blocks,” or financial obstacles, in four ways:
1. Believing You Can’t Have It All
When my client created an inverse relationship between her business and her home life, she forged a nonsensical connection between two completely separate issues. It’s akin to saying that one would give all the Oreos in the world to save the whales. Making creative bargains over things near and dear to us only reinforces the belief that we can’t have it all. WE CAN.
I frequently talk with clients who vocalize a goal of making $100,000 in the next 12 months. I consider this a very realistic goal. However, when we actually start a conversation about what it will take to get there, too many people begin to waffle and decide they’d be content with a lower figure. Why settle? There’s nothing wrong with setting out to make $50,000 or even $25,000 in a year, but don’t shy away from higher goals. You’ll never make $100,000 if you consider half that amount to be acceptable.
3. Making Comparisons
Comparing ourselves to others is something everyone does … and it’s something everyone needs to stop. The vast majority of comparisons are toxic, and it’s a fact that comparing your situation to that of someone else will inevitably end in unhappiness. All comparisons do is undermine your own sense of power and self-worth, even those in which we mentally come out on top. When you don’t feel worthy, your financial worth is affected as well.
4. Taking Your Eyes Off the Prize
Despite the fact that businesses exist to make money, some new business owners can’t seem to acclimate to the feeling at first. This peculiar discomfort manifests in chronic spending. It’s both OK and advisable to reinvest money in your business, but it’s also OK to make — and keep! — a profit. If you find yourself ceaselessly recycling the money you make, perhaps it’s time to take a look at your habits and where that money is going.
How to Release These Blocks
Step One in the process of releasing any money block is to attain clarity regarding the issue. At the point when you identify your block and how it applies to your situation, it will no longer have any power over you.
Step Two is getting out of your head, where all the worry happens. If you catch yourself in the midst of some anxiety over what you are doing, take a breather. A quick change of environment, a deep breath, or just a bit of music can help you get situated. Don’t engage with yourself when you are feeling negative.
Step Three is reframing your situation appropriately. Once you are calm and collected, ask yourself to identify a word or phrase that reflects the relationship you want to have with money. Write it down and post it somewhere you’ll see it often so that you can reflect on it over the next few days.
Take action only when you feel clear-headed. No matter what the plan, consider trying something new. Taking a new direction will help reinforce the fact that you have conquered your money block and that it is no longer a problem. Money blocks can take years to fully overcome, but each step you take in the process will make them less and less of an obstacle. Procrastination is the enemy of progress — start attacking your issues now!
Mindy Crary is a member of the DailyWorth Connect program. Read more about the program here.